As a business coach, I’m privy to the problems and frustrations that pile up on a business owner’s desk.  Many of these issues feel like the weight of the world, and can leave us feeling hopeless and without direction.

To shed some light on one particularly important issue, I’d like to peel back the curtain and expose the problems that deal with developing coaching teams, because I know my clients are not alone in their frustrations on this specific issue.  Here are a few common problems I hear…

  1. How can I get my coach on board? He/She just doesn’t believe in our programming.

  2. My instructor just doesn’t see all the coaching points in class or take care of the clients like I do.

  3. I feel like my coaches know they have leverage over me because I can’t afford to run all my classes without them.

  4. How do I find quality coaches if I can’t afford pay them what others do?

What I’m about to share with you is a lesson learned by watching parents and children.  Seriously, if you use this approach in your organization, the results will justify the means.

Growing up, our parents were our protectors, guidance providers, caregivers, support systems, and they always seem to be telling us what to do.  “Stay out of there,” “don’t put that in your mouth,” “sit down,” “stand up,” “go to the bathroom…”   As children, our needs were dependent on our parents looking after us.

Now in adulthood, we grow wise through experience.  We learn to think on our own, make decisions for our future, reflect on lessons of our past, and choose to live our lives on our own terms.

What helps with understanding owner/coach relationships in our businesses is that we, as owners, seem to naturally take on the parent/child relationship with our coaching teams.

However, in a business setting, it manifests more like this: “We need to sell more retail,” “you should coach the squat like this,” “just follow the checklist of cleaning duties,” “stick to the script.”   Sound familiar?  In this type of relationship the child (your coaching team) will not respond with motivation, initiative, or an eagerness to grow the organization when their parents (owners/managers) simply order them around.

So how do we change this destructive relationship and get back on track for growth?

It starts with you!  You must see your relationship with your team as an adult to adult relationship.  One where you can ask for outside opinions, solutions to problems, or advice on areas outside your knowledge base.  This is Important!  What I’m not asking you to do is forfeit the decision making.  I’m asking you to believe in your team as the intelligent, valuable, and productive group that they are.

For those of you stuck on the problems above, and can’t quite see the potential for changing your parent/child relationship, let’s focus on resolving one problem in particular and applying the same techniques to the others:

“My instructor just doesn’t see all the coaching points in class or take care of the clients like I do.”

Instead of “Hey coach, you’re doing xyz wrong, do it this way,” try: “Hey coach, would you be willing to have a conversations with me after your class? I see opportunity to help with xyz.”  (Adult to Adult- ask permission to help)

Instead of “Hey coach, your technique with xyz is totally wrong, I’ll show you how to do it right,” try: “I’d like to share a technique I found helpful for xyx and I think you’d be interested in learning how to use it too.” (Adult to Adult- mutual learning conversation).

Instead of “I don’t like the way you’re doing xyz, it’s either my way of the highway,” try: “We have a different perspective on xyz, can we discuss both resolving the issue and how to move forward?” (Adult to Adult- conversation instead of blame).

Instead of “You need to improve xyz in your classes,” try: “I’ve reviewed several of your classes and I see that xyz can be improved.”  (Adult to Adult- offering assistance).

If you would like some one-on-one help with running your business, reach out to The BIZ Team Today for consultingAnd be sure to tell us your thoughts and comments below.

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